Of Dreams and Other Lives
by Just-Absolutely-Super
Summary: [Edwin; Post Series] They say your dreams are visions of a another life you are living. Winry experiences a heartbreaking one.


**AN:** My first Edwin fic and it's mostly Winry-centric. Also, I made it sad. _That_ wasn't really a part of the plan… I also decided to try and write in the present tense, but there are some places where I felt I _needed_ past tense, so I'm scared half to death it looks jumbled up. Oh well…

This is what happens when you cry about FMA 03 Edwin while having some weird fascination with a character having insight into their AU self's life. (If that makes any sense...)

The majority of the fic takes place in the canonverse (FMAnga/FMA:B), however, at the end we go into the FMA 03-verse. I tried to make sure the narrative wasn't too confusing when it came to all this.

Also, some spoilers for the end of the FMA 03 anime and its movie. In case you guys actually plan on watching them…

Enjoy!

 **Disclaimer:** FMA isn't mine.

* * *

 _"I guess this is goodbye for good..."_

Winry groans as she rouses from her sleep, feeling more tired than she did when she fell asleep that night.

She had a very strange dream. She doesn't really remember it though. She remembers Edward and Alphonse were in the dream, but as for what they were doing she couldn't say. Whatever it was, the dream left her feeling extremely tired.

And extremely sad, too…

Winry frowns at that. Why would she be sad? She recalls some dreams she's had in the past where the boys never came home, but the feeling she had upon waking from those was more nervous rather than sad.

She shrugs. It's just a dream. She doesn't remember it anyway, so why bother dwelling on it?

Yawning, Winry rolls out of bed and trudges her way down the stairs and into the kitchen. There, she is met with the sight of her two best friends, the Elric Brothers. Alphonse (who finally managed to get his body back to a healthy state since the Promise Day) has his back to her while he fixes breakfast. His older brother Edward sits at the table, drinking coffee and reading the morning paper. She can't help but smile at the domestic sight.

Al doesn't bother sparing her a glance as he cheerfully says to her, "Good morning, Winry! Granny had to make a house call to Mr. Kline. His wife rushed in here saying his legs gave out while he was working in the field. She'll be back soon, though."

Winry nods, knowing full well whom her grandmother's client is. Apparently the old farmer Mr. Kline is just as bad at keeping up with his automail maintenance as Ed is.

Speaking of Ed, the former alchemist glances up from his paper to smile at his mechanic, causing butterflies to flutter in Winry's stomach. Edward really has grown into a handsome man over the past few years.

"Morning Win—GAAAH!"

Winry jumps at Ed's outburst. One moment he's smiling at her and then the next he's practically jumping out of his chair, staring at her with a panicked look.

"Wh-What's the matter with you?" Winry asks him.

"Yeah, Brother, why are you—Winry?! What's the matter?!" Al asks her, moving from his spot at the stove to join his older brother in gawking at her. He too has a look on his face that told Winry he was shocked and worried.

Winry stares dumbfounded at the two boys, "What are you talking about? I'm fine."

"Bullshit!" Ed spats, pointing an accusing finger at her, "You've been crying! What's wrong?"

Winry blinks in confusion. Crying? She hadn't been crying. What are they—?

Raising a hand up to her face, Winry touches her cheeks. She feels some moisture. Moving to a mirror that hangs on one of the walls, Winry examines her face. Sure enough there are tear tracks that were just now drying. Her eyes are bloodshot as well, making the blue of her irises stand out.

She _had_ been crying.

But for the life of her she doesn't know _why_.

She turns back to her two best friends and shrugs, "I guess I was crying. I don't know why though."

Edward raises an eyebrow at her and shares a confused look with his brother at the girl's confession. They turn back to her and examine her face, probably to make sure she isn't lying to them or anything.

"You're absolutely _sure_ nothing's wrong?" Ed asks skeptically.

"Yeah, Winry, if anything is bothering you, you know you can talk to us. We're always here for you," Al comforts, giving the girl a small smile.

Winry beams at the boys, "Thank you for your concern, but I really am okay. I had a weird dream last night, and even though I don't remember it, I do remember being sad in it. I probably subconsciously cried in my sleep."

She laughs it off, though the fact that she did cry in her sleep left her feeling uneasy. She wishes she knew what that dream was about now. It must've been bad if it left her feeling emotionally compromised to the point of tears.

She feels a pair of comforting arms around her. She looks up to see Alphonse. "Well, I'm glad you're okay. Whatever it was, it was just a dream. They aren't real."

Winry smiles at the younger boy and nods, "Yeah, of course. Thanks, Al."

"You're welcome!" Al removes himself from her side before shoving Edward towards her, "You're glad she's okay too, _right Brother_?"

Ed glares at the sly look Al is giving him, a bright blush on his cheeks. Coughing awkwardly, Ed faces Winry, his gaze avoiding hers, "Y-Yeah. It's good you aren't really sad or anything like that."

Winry gives the older Elric a small but genuine smile. He is still very awkward when it comes to his feelings for her, but Winry knows he's trying and really does care about her.

To her surprise, Edward quickly gathers her in his arms. The hug is so tight that her breath gets momentarily knocked out of her. Her cheeks flush as she feels his hot breath in her ear.

"But if you ever get sad again, don't play that cool act. You come talk to me, okay? Al too. Or Granny. Hell, even Den would be a good option." He sincerely says. His hold on her loosens enough for the girl to breathe, but thankfully he doesn't let go. Winry melts into the embrace, wrapping her arms around him to return the hug.

"I will. Don't worry. Thank you."

* * *

Winry's eyes snap open as she gasps out.

She quickly gets out of her bed and turns on the bedside lamp. She's trembling, tears profusely falling from her eyes as she gasps out heartbroken sobs.

It was that dream again.

She hasn't had it for months and barely remembers it, but she just _knew_ that's what it was.

She wasn't sure what was going on in the dream. It looked like Amestris, but at the same time it didn't—like she was in a whole different world altogether.

She had been standing in a city, but it wasn't a city she was familiar with. She remembered Al in the dream, but he didn't really _look_ like Al. He was younger, and his hair was a darker shade of blonde than what it should be—almost brown. It was longer too, similar to Ed's. She recalled Roy Mustang being in the dream too, but the details of his role were fuzzy at best.

But she does remember Edward in the dream, almost to a horrifying degree with how clear it was.

He had crashed to the ground in some kind of machine Winry wasn't familiar with. He was fine, if not a little beat up. She recalled hugging him in the dream, but it wasn't a hug she would have normally given him.

She had held him tightly, almost as if she hadn't seen him in a very long time. Like if she let go at that very moment, he'd disappear.

He seemed to be different too. He _looked_ like Edward, sure, but his eyes were different. Still gold in color, but they looked colder and more distant—like he was constantly putting up walls to protect himself. He also still had an automail arm instead of the flesh one he gained back after the Promise Day.

That was another thing that was off: his automail. It was badly broken in the dream. She couldn't find any humor that dream Ed is also reckless with his limbs because the automail he had didn't even _look_ like automail; at least, none _she_ is used to handling. Winry had set to work to fix him up. She gave him new and better limbs.

This was where the dream gets fuzzier, but Winry knew what was happening all the same.

Ed had left to fight someone—who, Winry wasn't sure—and the fight was taking place on an aircraft. Flying machines are something in the early stages of development according to Mr. Garfiel; so she's surprised to find her subconscious showing her this contraption that shouldn't even exist yet!

Something had happened because she saw the wing of the aircraft get torn apart. She wasn't sure how, but she thinks it was with alchemy. Had Ed done that?

Wait, no, Ed doesn't have his alchemy anymore. He gave it up for Al's body. How did he…?

 _"That must be Ed, I know it."_

Winry's eyes widen as she recalls her own voice echoing inside her head. The image of the aircraft was flying away into some unknown place far out of her reach.

She then remembers Mustang coming up to her in the dream and telling her that not only did Ed leave this world behind, but Alphonse did too, wanting to follow his brother.

They would never be able to come back…

 _"So, I guess this is goodbye for good."_

Winry gasps, sobs wracking her body. No. No, they can't be gone forever. _Edward_ can't be gone forever. It was a dream. It was just a dream!

But it was so real…

It felt _so real_!

She runs out of her room and opens the door to one of the bedrooms that the Elric Brothers always reside in.

Empty.

 _'No… No, it can't be!'_

Winry slides to the floor, her tears falling out of her eyes as she sobs. She's shaking all over and it's getting harder and harder to breathe. In the back of her mind, Winry knows she is suffering from a panic attack but she can't care at the moment.

They are gone.

Edward and Alphonse are gone. They left her and they are _never coming back_!

"Winry!"

Winry is startled from her thoughts when she sees her grandmother. She has a candle in her hand to help her see in the dark, her face is contorted in worry.

"Winry, honey, what's the matter? Why are you crying?" she asks as she sets the candle down and holds her granddaughter in her arms. The blonde feels a cold, wet nose nudging her side and the soothing lick of a wet tongue, indicating that Den has bounded over as well.

It takes a while for Winry to calm herself down enough to answer in between her sobs and hiccups, "E…Ed-Edward…! And Al! They….They're gon-gone!"

Pinako strokes her hair and stares at her granddaughter in confusion, "Of course they're gone, you silly thing. Don't you remember? Al went out East to study that healing alchemy stuff. We got a letter from him yesterday. And Edward went to the West to do some studying of his own. They've been gone for a little over three months now."

At her words, Winry finally comes back to reality. That's right, Ed and Al _did_ leave; but they didn't leave to some unknown world Winry couldn't get to. No, they just went to different countries to expand their alchemic knowledge.

They are just days away by train ride!

And they can return at any time!

This knowledge finally calms her down, though she is still shaken.

"I just… It just felt so real, Granny."

Her grandmother raises an eyebrow at her, silently asking her to elaborate.

"I had a dream. They were there, but then I saw them leave. First it was Ed, and then I found out Al left too. The feelings I felt were so real I just woke up and wanted to see if they were really gone. If they were here then I'd know for sure the dream didn't happen."

Pinako nods at the girl and rubs soothing circles on her back.

"How about I make you some tea to calm your nerves. Then you can go back to sleep. Does that sound good?"

Winry nods, "Okay…"

Pinako goes downstairs to start the kettle in the kitchen, but Winry stays behind, still staring into the empty bedroom.

It is okay… The boys are okay…

But why is she still uneasy?

Taking a shaky breath, Winry forces herself to stand and makes her way down the stairs; Den rushing ahead of her once she sees her master is okay. She pauses when she spots the telephone out of the corner of her eye, a notepad next to it. A string of numbers is written and Winry recognizes them.

A few days ago, Ed called her from a house in Creta. He had befriended a professor who was kind enough to allow the young man to stay with him and his family. The man's youngest son took a liking to Ed and decided to tease him about his affections for his mechanic. This led to the boy finding the phone number for the Rockbell home and calling Winry to get a rise out of the former Fullmetal Alchemist. One thing led to another and the boy gave Winry his house number.

 _"In case you wanted to talk to your booooooyfriend—" he teased before yelping in surprise._

 _"GIVE ME THE PHONE YOU LITTLE—" she heard Ed's enraged scream before the line disconnected._

Winry smiles at the memory and thanks whoever is listening that she was given this phone number.

It's late, and she'd probably feel bad about it in the morning, but she can't care right now. She has to call him. She has to hear his voice.

She has to make sure he really is _there_.

Picking up the receiver, Winry dials the number listed on the notepad.

She waits one…two…three rings and thinks about hanging up. She doesn't know what time it is over there but if it is as late as it is here, then she wouldn't be surprised if nobody picks up—

"Hello?" comes an unknown voice, sleep evident in their tone.

It takes Winry a bit to process that someone indeed is answering the phone.

"Uh…ummm, I'm so sorry!" she begins, feeling very embarrassed, "I just…I was calling for Edward Elric. Is he still living there?"

She holds her breath. What is she thinking? Calling at this god-awful hour! And chances are Edward won't be there. He probably left ages ago! He's never one to stay still, why would he—

"Who is calling?" asks the voice.

Winry shakes her head of her thoughts, "M-My name is Winry Rockbell, sir. I'm a friend of his from Amestris."

 _'Friend? Really?'_ Winry rolls her eyes, _'Not like I promised him all my life to him or anything. Geez, Winry, get a grip!'_

"Hang on. I'll get him." The man yawns on the other line and Winry hears the sound of the receiver being put down. She fidgets on the balls of her feet, now _very_ aware of how silly she's being. She just hopes Edward isn't angry with her for the disruption.

"Hello?" comes the groggy and irritated voice of Edward Elric, "Winry? Professor Rodriguez said it was you calling. What in the name of Truth are you doing calling in the middle of the friggin' night?"

Before Winry could explain, she feels her throat close up as more tears well up in her eyes. She can't help it, hearing his voice had triggered something deep inside her.

He is _there_. He is there and _talking_ to her. He didn't leave forever!

"W-Winry?" now Ed's voice sounds worried, "You there?"

"E-Ed!" Winry chokes out; a new wave of sobs wracking her body.

"Winry?! Winry, what's wrong? Why are you crying? What's the matter?" he frantically asks, "Is it Granny? Is she okay? What about Den? Oh god, please tell me it isn't Al! Winry, please talk to me!"

"It's fine!" she finally manages to say to him, "Everyone's fine! I swear. I'm just…I'm just being really stupid right now."

She hears him let out a sigh of relief before he softly commands, "Tell me what happened."

So she does. She cries as she tells him of the dream (more like _nightmare_ ) where he and Al left her alone forever. It takes a bit of explaining because she keeps having a hard time composing herself, but she eventually finishes the retelling, feeling very emotionally drained.

"Wow. That's one hell of a dream…" is what Ed finally says.

Winry nods, not caring that he can't see her right now. "I know. It's stupid. I'm sorry for waking you and your host."

"Nah, don't be. With this time zone stuff it's not as late here as it is there. I actually wasn't asleep for that long," he reassures, but Winry knows he is just saying that to make her feel better.

There's a brief silence between them, Winry reveling in the sound of Ed's breathing before he speaks again.

"Tell you what," he begins, piquing Winry's curiosity, "my leg is starting to feel a bit off. I guess I've been pretty rough on it... How about I come home so you can do some maintenance on it? I'll try to get on the earliest train I can find tomorrow."

Winry feels an immense amount of guilt, "No, no! You just got settled, Edward! Don't come back for my sake! I'll be fine, I promise! Think of your research."

She can't see him but she knows he is rolling his eyes, "All this information isn't going anywhere. I can always come back. Besides, it's been three months yet I've learned so much already. Aren't you the one always telling me to take care of my automail?"

Winry deflates, "Ed, you really don't have to…"

"I know I don't _have_ to," he says, "but I _want_ to. I miss you."

Winry feels her heart melt at his words. "I miss you, too."

"Good. So I'll see you in a few days, all right? Try to get some sleep. You can't be the best automail engineer if you're keeling over from exhaustion!"

Winry giggles. Somehow Ed always knows what to say to cheer her up. "Okay, I will. Thank you, Ed."

"Don't mention it," he says. There's a pause and Winry wonders if he had hung up. Then she hears his voice quietly but gently say, "I love you."

Winry's smile grows, cheeks pink as she feels more tears come to her eyes. This time they are tears of happiness.

"I love you, too. Be safe, I'll see you in a few days."

With that they hang up. Winry goes into the kitchen to find her Granny sitting at the table, Den resting at her feet. Across from her is a freshly made cup of tea just for the blonde.

"How is Edward?" she asks, a knowing look on her face.

Winry blushes, "He's good. He's coming home in a couple of days. For maintenance."

"Right, _mainentance_ ," Pinako chuckles, stirring her own cup of tea. She gives Winry a calculative glance before speaking again.

"You know, there have been old myths and legends that say that your dreams are visions of another life."

Winry contemplates this piece of information as she sips her tea.

"I never believed it, though," her grandmother waves off. "It just seems like something to ponder about…"

Winry absently nods, staring at her cup in deep thought.

 _'Another life, huh?'_

It is a farfetched notion, but as Ed and Al would tell her, _"Nothing is impossible."_

"I wonder how she's doing." Winry says before she can stop herself.

"Who?"

"The other me. Or dream me, I guess?" Winry replies, not quite sure how to refer to the woman she had embodied in her subconscious, "Her Edward and Alphonse left her. I wonder what she did to recover. Do you even think she _did_ recover?"

She watches as her grandmother mulls over her questions before taking a final sip of her tea and rising from her chair to put it away. Once the task is complete, she walks over to Winry to give her a peck on the crown of her head.

"Of course she's okay. There's no doubt in my mind about it."

Winry gives her a questioning look, "How do you know?"

Pinako smiles at her, "Because, darling, she's a Rockbell. Rockbell women are strong. _You're_ strong."

For the umpteenth time tonight, Winry feels more tears gather in her eyes. Honestly, how many more tears does she have in her?

Wiping away any stray tears that escape her eyes, Winry gives her grandmother a fierce hug. The old woman returns it just as fiercely. When they part, Pinako gives a tired yawn.

"If you excuse me, I'm going back to bed. You should do the same after you finish your tea. You can sleep in this morning. I'll handle your customers until you wake up."

"Thank you, Granny. For everything." Winry says, giving her grandmother a kiss on her cheek.

"You're welcome." With that, the old woman leaves Winry alone with her thoughts.

Staring at the remainder of her tea, she continues to mull over her dream. She can't help herself, it really did feel like she was there and experiencing everything happening. The emotions she felt were certainly real. After all, they had carried on into the waking world.

And despite Pinako's words, she still worries for her counterpart. Is she really okay?

Winry shakes her head and decides to push it out of her mind. What good is dwelling on something that ultimately doesn't affect her in the first place?

Finishing her tea, Winry places the cup in the sink and calls for Den to accompany her back to her room. Once there, she curls up under her covers and feels her eyelids droop. She refuses to think about the dream or this "other life" nonsense. Instead, she thinks about Edward and how he would be coming home in a few days.

He is coming home _to her_.

* * *

 _In another life, another universe, there is a different version of Winry Rockbell who experiences realistic dreams too._

 _In these dreams she sees Edward and Alphonse standing in front of her, smiling and laughing._

 _They aren't gone. They're_ with her _._

 _Alphonse looks different than what she remembers. He looks to be the age he should have been had he not regressed those four years in the Gate. His hair color is also a lighter shade, matching his older brother's._

 _She couldn't hear what the dream Al was saying to her, but after giving her a brotherly side-hug he runs off back to the house—probably to help her Granny fix supper—and leaves her with Edward._

 _Looking at this Edward, she can tell he is happier and lighter here. Less burdened by the harshness of the world._

 _He has a flesh arm too, which she thinks is odd, but she can't say she isn't happy to see the lack of metal. She can't see his left leg, though, for his long pants. Is it flesh too?_

 _She hears herself say something to him (but again, she isn't quite sure what it is), causing him to roll his eyes and childishly pout. She laughs at him, and is glad to see that he joins in laughing with her as well._

 _It's then that the dream Edward moves towards her and pulls her into his embrace. He's warm, and Winry feels safe. She can feel all the tension and worry leave her body._

 _"I love you, Gearhead."_

 _She smiles._

 _"I love you too, Alchemy Freak."_

 _She then finds herself inquiring, "You'll always be here, right?"_

 _She feels him nod against her shoulder._

 _"Of course. You, Al, and me; we're a team. We'll always be here for each other. That's a promise!"_

 _She melts in his embrace. "Promise…"_

 _Winry's eyes slide open, feeling content and happy. She always did after these particular dreams. That is, until reality kicks in and she'd feel that familiar emptiness again…_

 _The first time she experienced them she felt such a crushing sadness at the fact the dreams were never reality. Edward and Alphonse aren't here with her. They are having their own adventures in some other dimension she can't access._

 _Her grandmother had once told her that dreams show a life another version of you is experiencing, but Winry isn't so sure. That is such a fantastical concept._

 _But if it is real… That means there is a life she lives where Ed and Al came home whole and happy. And they never_ left _._

 _She's envious of that version's Winry._

 _Sighing, Winry stretches and pulls herself out of bed, ready to start a new day._

 _No use dwelling on things that can't be helped. What's done is done. And she has an automail business to attend to._

 _Before she heads out the door, she spares one last glance to the framed photo of her two best friends. A bittersweet smile spreads across her pretty face._

 _"I hope the dream me never takes you two for granted."_

* * *

 **AN:** 03 WINRY DESERVED BETTER *CRIES FOREVER*

*ahem*

I wanted to portray Canon Winry and 03 Winry as separate characters from separate universes. I wanted to explore how Canon Winry would react to Ed and Al leaving with no intentions of coming back. I also intended to show 03 Winry's reaction to Ed and Al being home, but sadly, I ran out of inspiration for her side. I mostly wrote this for Canon Winry's POV anyway.

I hope it wasn't confusing to you guys. The fic was mostly focused on Winry and her relationship with Ed, but I tried to include Al as much as possible because it'd be a _sin_ if I didn't include Actual Piece of Sunshine Alphonse Elric!

If you were able to follow all that and liked it, hit me up with a review. Maybe the next time I upload some Edwin it'll be more on the fluffy side.


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